Finding the way 2

Hello kid. First, I would like to thank God through my Lord Jesus Christ and the Counselor he has sent to me. Because of him, I am alive, I'm aware that sin is bad. I know sin leads to distractions. I hate sin, I hate everything that leads to sin. I don't like sin. Whenever I sin, it's like a rock in my shoes that stubs me every time I take a step. However, just like you, I sin. I hate sin, but I love doing it. I hate the result, but I love the action. I hate the world, but I love doing what the world does. I hate anger, but anger feels good. Remember that 6'3 light skin brother you plotted against in high school. Not long ago, it was just me and him in the elevator. I said "wassup with you?” With a burning tongue, I wished for him to say something mean. I woulda cursed him, forced him to throw a punch. Of course, I had my blade with me, I woulda aimed it at his neck. And after, use my paper spray, so he burns in his own blood. I woulda done what you wanted to do all along. So, of course I feel angry, and of course it feels good. And it feels better now than ever. You couldn't enjoy anger because you are “weak.” You said to yourself. But how could you enjoy it with such small biceps, with such a nice smile. I love anger because I trust my palms might grip someone's skull, I have a blade with my name printed on it, I can take a Glock apart and put it back together. I love anger because I enjoyed revenge, some who made me mad, I have killed before. At the range, when I thought of them, I aim for their chest. I visualized them, I took my time and slaughtered them. My Lord Christ have mercy on my soul. Forgive me for such sins. Save me from the world, save me from anger, save me the judgement, my Lord Christ, if not to you, were will I run? Allow your glory to be my life's mission. May your will be done into my life. Kid you are young, your heart is less sinful, your mind less corrupted. Ask, and plead with God to make it better through Jesus Christ. I know my Lord my Jesus Christ, I know the co