kanaris

next week it will be 112 tracks, it's over

it is unlikely I'll do anything* i keep forgetting to read my messages before sending

unfortunately no, my spark ran out for it. i wanted to do a thing which required a sampler originally, tried to play around with other things but nothing came of it plus i was relearning the whole studio basically so rip that draft. thinking now to directly export some stems into bitwig, but my pc got fucked in transport from cologne so I'm out of action for a week or two till my pc is fixed. It is likely I'll do anything but if I make something I'll let you know. I'm free to collab but idk what this laptop is capable of

it has detacheable nose/snout plates, revealing the cybernetics underneath super sick

thank you

i agree with pretty much everything you said i also don't really think the religion route is very good to take seriously but it works for some people. there is some cool things to take note from it but overall you end up being a servant to a magical dead guy from thousands of years ago. idk man i guess that's enough purpose for some people lol

i had the time to properly read all this, I've never heard of logotherapy but it sounds exactly how i live my life. pretty interesting that i came to those conclusions myself through random chance pretty much. wanted to also say, never read the bible that much, i just get my info from a few friends but you do have agency even in religion, otherwise god would've made you a servant by default. also hell only exists for people who don't feel bad about being evil to others. i think there is a misconception that anything sinful will take you straight to hell, but actually it's *knowing* that you did something sinful and not feeling bad about it. like murder, stealing and feeling no remorse for it. something something jesus changed the rules so you are forgiven as long as you are self aware and have basic morals (probably wrong)

being a furry is just like being in a religion 😆 someone also told me of a funny ego glitch when I'm so invested in my fursona that my fursona gets a fleshona but the fleshona is just me so my lack of self-esteem becomes self-deleting as the more I escape reality into my fursona the more I love my reality-self

You are right though. There is one aspect religion is really good at if done right. Community. It helps you socialise. (That is if you go to church or religious events). It's a place where you can be vulnerable (in particular fields of life). It's hanging out for those who need it in that form.

The only thing I also wanted to point out is random chance. While all your decisions result in something, which means you need to be properly prepared, sometimes you don't know what will happen. But you are your own agent and stronger than you think sometimes. A leap of faith can get you very far even if you need a lot of energy to fix something when you mess up anyways. Don't let important opportunities slip. Worst case is you come out smarter. Otherwise there are things we can not control. There are things that just happen. There are very terrible things that just happen. And I think it's not a good idea to ALWAYS have an object, diety, yourself to blame. Trying to find a culprit, blame and such will likely just fuel grief, strifes and your own unwellness. Don't blame. It happened. Use your energy to do something about it instead of wishing upon a star or something. Also, hope. I took a long time to actually understand this, but hope isn't a positive illusion. It is reality in the future. Hope is an action. If you hope for a good outcome, if you hope and believe that outcome will come, you are FAR more likely to work towards that goal despite all roadblocks. You are far more likely going to go through lengths you wouldn't realize are possible that would have been feats in the pessimistic mind. Never forget that. Hope is an active action and a real way to shape the future. Either way, I agree with Kai on one front for sure. And Lorn really put it best with literally one sentence. You are a dagger.

That is the whole concept of logotherapy. Purpose is great. However, religion is something I wouldn't recommend too much. It goes against some of my fundemental beliefs. They are 2- 1. You have agency, and 2. you have responsibility. These 2 are constants that are unchangeable. 1st, you have the agency to control your own life. Either you have a way to change the situation you are in, or the mindset about something. This agency is something that can't really be taken away, but neither can it be transfered to someone else. It is on you. Nobody will do things for you. Mind you, this includes asking for help/getting yourself help. There is always a way to react, even in the most hopeless situations. You can move and you will move, even if just milimeters at first. But it is YOU who has to take that step and there is nobody who will do it for you. 2nd, having responsibility works the same way. You are responsible for your own life and partially for your surroundings. You can't remove it, you can't change it. If you messed up, you are responsible, everytime you really succeed, you are responsible. You are here and you inevitably have an impact on reality. Better make it a good one. People inevitably hurt others, even if it was you. That is just an example of what not to do to others. Easier said than done, but nothing is easy. And that is why I am basically completely carnal/secular, considering what religion seems to always have been, which is an excuse for things. And religion, if it works on the concept of a omnipotent being, is there to outsource your agency and your responsibility, which is completely against my concept of things. I think there are people who can't function otherwise and crumble in the wake of random chance. and the 2 constants I described. Results may vary. But it's essential that you question everything and I mean EVERYTHING in your life. Being mislead is very easy. Being mislead by the concept of hell/eternal damnation and being controlled by that is catastrophic (plenty of instances of that in history). Don't let yourself be manipulated by dogma. There is no such thing. The smarter you are, the better you get at life.

addendumaddendum: i think finding a purpose is the best thing anyone can do is because you can disregard a lot of life's problems when you have a purpose to aim for. a lot of the noise in life becomes so much more insignificant when you have some sort of thing to reality check yourself and ask whether something affects your goals towards your purpose. but it can also be a source of problems too with the wrong mindsets. also one more thing - eat well, sleep well and take care of your mortal shell by working out every now and then and soon enough your mind will also be in a better condition. it's one of the most underrated things someone can do

addendum: "the mind is more powerful than you think" you can improve your mental wellness but you can also destroy it very easily. i think the best thing that anyone struggling can do is find a purpose. an actual purpose which you spend your entire life working towards. nothing half baked. whoever came up with religion was an absolute genius at giving aimless people a purpose. (i'm talking about the pure uncorrupted version, not american WE HATE ALL GAY!! version) but there are also other ways to achieve the same state. the main criteria for a good purpose is that it must be unfulfillable in a lifetime. * the biological one, reproduction and raising a child (this is impossible in current era, but nothing stays the same. worth considering at some point) the brain is kinda wired for this one so it requires the least amount of perspective change * the arts. art and music is unlimited, it's simply impossible to master everything in a lifetime. and if you dedicate your life to it, it's pretty awesome but it requires a certain viewpoint and also needs to be worked on with full passion, for basically ever to be any good as an actual lifelong purpose. not an easy one but if you can do this, then good for you * career progression - also pretty difficult in current era but you can always move up the ranks in some place you semi-enjoy working. or even just in the sector. there is an infinite amount of things to improve and a lifetime amount of customers to serve. some other things to consider * acceptance that things are just out of your control, acceptance of the inevitability of failure and preparing for failures just in case. have you really tried everything to avoid a source of pain in your life? both answers are fine (yes/no) but its always good to ask anyways * never see yourself as the present you. present you sucks. present you has trouble doing things. present you is unskilled and stupid. but nobody is stupid forever unless they change. and we always change, usually for the better. * many people have been hurt by religion, but i still would not disregard everything about it. current day religion is corrupted by greed and hatred. there is still some good things to learn from it. but overall i would just treat it as a book to cheat code getting a purpose. its quite the powerful one. a lot of science, laws&morals and culture is based off this thing. mainly i want to pinpoint the 7 deadly sins. you can make a purpose out of anything in life, and its quite easy to make a purpose out of those 7 things. so just wanted to mention that and be careful not to do that. mind is powerful in good and bad ways. YOU ARE A DAGGER

its fine lol thank you